previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
would be helpful there are malicious entities down here come on you guys are
doing great moot blow harder you're doing great blim like my goodness just
slay me can you do it over here not over here sorry I like to imagine I
got to do it like a big you know wipe of the face the bioluminescence off
it's like with the thaumaturgy still going never mind no rush I got this
one you doing okay Agatha what would you see down there the bioluminescence was
pretty before it started trying to kill us oh the giant bugs are not as
pretty but have a very satisfying crunch not a lot of blame but just
remember if there's like a life-or-death situation could go either
way the mission must continue
welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons I'm your dungeon master Russ More he him
also with me today is Loki loud boy who I will try to edit out of today's
episode but he's having a time so also with me though is Tom Laird hey
that's me he him I am playing moot who also goes by he him Amy More yes
I'm here also firsthand experiencing Loki having a time and I will be playing
Sullivan slight he him and I am she her and Carla Max dead she her playing
glim also she her and Kristen Flemons she her I'm playing Agatha also she
her Wow Wow there it is that was a segue yeah you know where you can get
cool segues like that over on Patreon Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast dumb
dragon yes that's the one dumb dragon cast they're so close so close but my
segue was yeah I'm just on point yeah right into yeah that's good all the
segues are happening mostly Tom segues trying to get all of us to
stop talking as we play the game all of us each the three of us equally
oh yeah yeah yeah not yeah yeah he tries to stop all of us from yeah it's
really a lot of running rough shot over that one yeah yeah all of us are
equally respectful of Tom's game and what he's trying to accomplish yes
fully when Tom messages me that he has something to accomplish I will be
yeah it's true actually though messaging me like days before he's like if you
want a plan I'm here and I'm like I got something don't you yeah it's a
Tom just says open world and Russ just runs yeah I got something don't worry
Russ we could plan this together but instead I'm gonna let you figure it
out it's all good that's correct it's a blast is what it happens and
Kristen we should have you over there because it's a great time that sounds
great right Tom and now Kristen's gonna be there as respectful as respectful as
as me or as them yes well time will tell got it we're gonna see how it goes but
also when you're a patron you get an episode dedicated to you like today's
patron copper crow. Copper crow. Thank you copper crow. Sounds like a song. Or like a really cool gastropub. I want it to be. Copper crow and me signing up for Patreon. Sounds like it's gonna be a sitcom. It is now. You know what I was
gonna while counting crows it was a little subdued because I was you know
playing with the volume of my voice to see if Loki would stop and he has so
thank you copper crow for making that happen and thank you for being an
awesome patron also yes lulling Loki to sleep right you too can lull Loki to
sleep at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where we record sleep tapes for
exclusively for my dog. We pay you over a bitch to put our dog to sleep. We fly you out you can just you can just just on record nights you can pet him till he just your best friend and falls
asleep but now fuck it let's play. It's been a long journey up Mount
Celestia. Several days to get to the point where we last saw our friends
and then several more days as the journey continues. Where do we find you all now and what are you talking about as you as you feel like to pay based on
Matamar's description you feel like you're getting close to the peak the summit the Bahamut Villa. The penthouse if you will. I think Sully is like kind of like trotting along beside a
gas and like carrying the head for her and like you kind of cut into the middle of a conversation like well I think sometimes letting others go forward and doing all the action and
stand on the sidelines is like one of the bravest things you can do. I think I'm just saying that is an interesting position. Yeah sometimes you just got to hold it back and see what the
scene needs and then you toss in a little chaos and then you step out. Well no I like tossing a rope. Which is like chaotic exit. It's like will it hold won't it hold we don't know what it's tied up to just fall back
it could have been just a big prank. Oh listen because when I was I was I was a boat smith for a while. Naturally. I knew all the knots. I was a pirate. So you know the double figure eight loop de doop. No I'm talking about the knot. Yeah of course I know knots that's why my boats all stay in the harbor. Do they? No. Oh okay we can work on some knots we got a while to go and it's kind of one of those things where it's just like. Alright let's get Nottie up in here.
Moot leans over to Glim and says how long until you think a Gath absolutely loses it. Oh I don't know. Are we on like either side of her but kind of like talking through her. Yeah and like feeling like she's a part of the conversation and she's just like I wish I was.
Just the audible grinding of teeth. Yeah. I have a much longer stride. How do they keep up with me.
Well I get a jog I've got the head like I'm like your assistant. I just want to be a part of something. Okay so Moot I don't want to be like embarrassingly. Okay so maybe you can help me right because we're going to go see.
Oh right of course yes. So like I maybe need because you know when I get there I'm going to be like.
You know yeah yeah right. I mean I know myself well enough to know that that's probably what I'm going to be like so I'm really hoping that you can just like take me down from here just like down to here a little bit so I can not frighten him. Sure.
And like be cool you know like make a good impression. Naturally. So can you help me with that.
I think so.
Do you want to like do some role play. Oh sure yeah 100 percent. Yeah okay.
You'll be Bahamad. Okay.
And I'll be me. Oh do you want to be me. No no no I think it's better if if I'm Bahamad in this situation you can really really get into it. What are you like you're like on a throne or are you just like chilling in a garden. I feel like maybe the latter because he's kind of.
I've seen Bahamad before. It's me Matamar. I was just pacing back because I've got a mind flayer.
Oh oh my god. Okay. It's okay.
Bahamad usually like Bahamad usually like chills in like a hammock and he's like swaying back and forth.
And lets the breeze flow through his hair. Yeah interesting. Alright alright alright.
Okay and scene. Oh hey Bahamad. We're just here we're on a mission to say the word and you know all about it because you gave me that book so it's just. Whoa whoa let's just slow it down a little bit.
Okay wait was that mood as moot or moot as Bahamad I mean. It's me being Bahamad. Okay chill relaxed dude swinging in a hammock Bahamad.
Okay let me try again because maybe that was too much. Okay.
Oh you're bringing in a real energy with you aren't you. Okay that was I went I went in the wrong.
I'm sorry I went in the wrong direction. Okay I'm going to think about it.
Glim do you need a prop. Maybe if you had a prop to work with you could be more focused. That could focus me.
Okay thank you oh god. Maybe you should bring the head. I'm going to toss her the head. Here's the head. Oh it's so it's so sticky.
I wasn't I guess I thought it'd be drier like in the chitin but it's okay. Okay so moot you be Bahamad. Okay.
Okay heads up.
And I throw the head.
It works on two of them. Right. Like you guys are going to play beach volleyball with that thing. Bahamad's such a cool guy.
Is it going to be like the scene from Top Gun because then I'm very interested.
Wait doesn't isn't there a movie where Matthew McConaughey plays beach volleyball. There's got to be one that's a little more.
I feel like there must be right. There has to be. That has to be the central plot of one of them.
We're googling right now. It's very important. I feel like I can picture it in my mind.
But I think I probably just am picturing Val Kilmer in Top Gun with Matthew McConaughey's face.
Same hair though so it's fine. I mean I don't hate that.
Nothing to complain about there. I mean the first picture that comes up on Google Images
is of Matthew McConaughey shirtless with a green bandana sunglasses on the beach.
Sounds like he is or just was playing beach volleyball.
Yeah and then of course because Google Images you know follows the like if you like this image
you're going to like all these images. So there's one two three four five six seven eight nine
ten eleven at least eleven very different beach scenes with different beach shorts in each one.
So he spends a lot of time on the beach so this feels relevant.
Hundred percent he's picked up a volleyball at some point then.
So you're playing volleyball with the head.
Yeah Moot kind of like fumbles the head because he was not expecting the the the toss.
It says I don't think this is the right approach either.
Oh okay I'm gonna I'll just think about it and.
Okay okay maybe. Like you know how you will quite often you know do some praying or
writing in a diary or or that sort of thing. Just just pretend like that's what's happening
when you meet Bahamut. You know obviously pause and wait for him to answer when you've
asked him questions like don't just steamroll through. Not a full self-guided two-hour
meditation. Exactly you need there's some back and forth that needs to happen here.
Do you think I could just borrow your notepad for a second and just jot down
a couple of these ideas and then.
Hundred percent you can.
Thank you oh you're such a good friend.
And I'm gonna toss that head back or did you toss it back to me or do you still have it.
I still have it for the time being.
Okay I'll just leave that with you.
So we all take turns carrying this head up a hill.
Yep that's right.
We we cut ahead several hours and you the the scene around you is very becomes very rocky.
I guess very forested up most of the way up this mountain then it starts to become very rocky
and you find yourselves like in this this foggy cloud that is surrounding or covering
the peak concealing it from from the base of the mountain.
Um you're making your way up through uh scaling rock at certain points.
How does Sully deal with that?
Uh I think pretty good he's got small hands so the like being able to find the hand
holds and the grips and the toe holds uh surprisingly easy for him he's light he's
agile he's dextrous he's got this.
And who's watching Matamor?
Dude's part goat he should be fine.
But he's got a tadpole in his brain.
Right he did share that information.
I had forgotten that information.
Yeah that is the thing anyways uh he is uh is.
Have we had the talk yet of like when it comes time don't worry we'll put you down.
You're having it right now.
So I'm just getting a little air is pretty thin up here.
Yeah for everybody else too.
Isn't it lovely?
Well it's very refreshing.
Yeah yeah it's lovely.
I'm a ground dweller so I prefer like the pressure of the earth above me and below me.
Dude your eyes are like rimmed so red right now.
Well it's just like it's like it's very dusty and it's dusty to everybody else.
No it's kind of like misty foggy so it's moisture in the air.
Yeah no.
Listen man how you feeling?
Well I'm getting a little fatigued more so than usual.
I made this trek a couple times in my time and it was never quite this tired.
But uh doing yeah A plus number one.
A plus?
A plus it's just like a hundred percent.
Giving it a hundred ten percent every time I'll go out on the field.
Just watching these birds fly by.
They're the ones making that weird sound that you're probably hearing.
They're real screechy.
Real screechy birds.
They call them the screechers.
They're they're totally harmless.
Don't worry about them.
They really are great for the ecosystem.
Listen buddy.
So like.
I can't do it Glim.
This whole time Glim has been totally silent ever since Moot was practicing because she's
been like really kind of playing all these options through in her mind about like well
maybe I could do that and I can do that and I'm maybe no I can't go for a high five like
what if he doesn't go and then it's awkward or like can't hug and so that's just an
interior uh monologue for the last however long two hours we've been hiking.
Um sorry Sully.
What was that?
Oh uh well we're just having the talk right now.
Like the sex talk?
No not the sex talk.
I've heard that before.
Okay great.
But the talk about Mademoiselle and how he could be maybe not feeling good.
Because uh right you did mention I don't want to put words in your mouth but I feel
like you did mention that you might have something growing.
Like a possibility of like.
Like maybe there's a foreign invader kind of um.
Wrapped around the stem of my my brain.
Yeah yeah yeah yeah so.
So at what so like let's just say that I was bitten by a zombie right.
Okay.
And it was like you know it not fast acting or anything like that but I knew at one point
I was going to change and and eat my friends.
Right.
So I probably have a conversation with my friends about at what point we would
like to stop that from happening so I didn't eat my friends and they die.
Wow okay so.
Does that feel perhaps applicable to you?
Well I mean it feels relevant that if you have a time of which you
want us to off you before you become a zombie.
No not me I have not actually been bitten by a zombie.
Right we're talking about the brain.
You're talking about your yeah.
Well before it breaks forth but not until we've given it enough time to maybe make it like
we just got to crest through these clouds and then I feel like we're just like right there.
Like I can probably make it.
Oh god hold on uh group huddle not you madama.
Are we bringing just like a ticking time bomb up to Bahamut?
So is it bad we're bringing him because he's definitely turning into like a weird mind flayer
or is it good because more proof like head and then also like.
And brainstemmy thingy.
And maybe Bahamut could like fix them.
Maybe he could help them.
Anyone can cure him I would hope Bahamut would.
Right so all we have to do is stop him from like turning totally bad and terrible
for like however long it's going to take like just like a few minutes or you know
just maybe if we keep him talking and we know if he starts acting.
Should we like tie him up or something?
I have a net.
What if.
You could yeah.
What if it's like a butterfly net
and can just carry him around in it.
And you could like maybe put it on Rax's like saddle and we can just.
Yeah and he is really tired anyway.
Like not drag him behind obviously that would be very cruel and rude.
Yes but just like it's like him getting carried up on I mean it would be kind of nice
probably he's really tired.
He's so tired.
He seems to know that you know the end could be nigh but maybe not but just in case it is.
Yeah.
It'd be better to have him in a net than not in a net.
Yeah net better than not for sure.
Okay so it's settled.
Yes.
Hey Mademar.
Hey.
You're tired hey buddy.
Yeah sun's going down.
It's time for Mademar's last ride.
That's right big guy.
Sun's getting real low.
Why are you comparing him to the Hulk?
You don't know Mademar.
You don't know his story.
Okay so yeah you know you're getting real tired hey.
Yeah.
What if you're crawled into this net here and we just lean it over the saddle
and you can take it's kind of like a hammock right guys.
Very much.
Here's Bahamut's hammock.
Me and Bahamut that's one thing we have in common is how much we love hammocks.
So you can just chill out in there you can just keep talking to us let us know how
you're feeling but just in case something goes sideways you're in a net.
Love it okay.
And then maybe when we get there Bahamut can fix you up.
Bada bing bada boom.
Papa John's.
Agath I can't actually like lift him in this thing.
Yeah upsy's.
I've got this.
Tuck him in.
Nice little.
Thank you yes.
Little swaddle.
I tie a knot at the top.
Yeah a little tighter.
That's just like just the way I used to do it.
We're weird about it.
No it's okay it's in our culture.
Okay up on the saddle he goes.
Oh all right he's out.
That's sort of sweet.
I really hope we don't have to kill him.
Yeah that would be quite it's like I mean are there any of them left.
Exactly what if he's the last of his kind.
Oh Russ is making some very uncomfortable nods.
Yeah nodding shrugging shaking his head it's very confusing.
I mean half a bottle of wine Russ is indecisive.
I mean think about it though if he is the last one like there's no other one.
Isn't that worse in a way.
Yeah like so sure.
What is it Schrodinger's.
Cat.
Cavern.
I know it's the cat but I'm thinking the cavern the cavern.
Schrodinger's matamars.
The cavern that you you made it in and he fell asleep you didn't see any other ones
but he went in there so as far as you know there's an entire village.
Right that's true and if we don't look.
You never know.
They are and aren't in there at the same time.
That's the name of this episode Schrodinger's.
Cavern matamar.
Cavern cat matamar.
Wait matamar is a what.
Schrodinger's catamar.
I mean you've created this little dude you should probably name his race.
You know what I probably should.
There's going to be a backstory episode where everything was revealed but nobody
has exclusively asked him and now he's asleep so you can't.
Well that's awkward you're not that's not a question you ask.
Exactly that's all I'm saying.
So what are you we can't that's no.
That's right up there with where are you from.
No no where are you from.
Yeah exactly.
Yeah Chicago yeah no really yeah exactly can't do that.
You can't do that.
We're not those people.
So now I'm curious you've got to like create.
Join us at Patreon.com dumb dragon cast and sometime between now and the next three years
I will have created a backstory episode for matamar exclusively which encompasses the
entire species of his people and who they are and what they are and why they have
so many pop culture references from the real world.
Right that is an interesting twist.
It is yeah it's something that I have not consciously thought of but just kept
doing so now I was like committed to it.
Yeah he's like hey you guys you guys up to date on stranger things or what.
Yeah I think that's great it's kind of like you guys seen enchanted right.
There's a portal to the regular human world there probably is for these dudes.
He's watching Netflix just like everybody else.
Exactly all right we've stalled long enough it's time to crest through the clouds.
Hmm you continue to climb after having slung a matamar around racks and I said there were
like steep sheer faces but racks is a real good climber can't do bridges very well
but does steep rock faces like a pro.
Because we don't need another episode of trying to get a horse through.
No we're just going to go this is what we're doing now.
You've done it once you know that that conversation happened.
Now we fast forwarded it you know what even just gives like a here's this here's there's
a sheer rock face in front of you somebody give me a how are we going to get racks up that.
How we can get racks up that thing.
We cut ahead racks is up the sheer rock.
He did it I don't even know why I asked.
And you crest through the clouds and as you crest through the clouds the sun
is beating down upon you ever so brightly the warmth is healing in its in its nature
and the fatigue that you were feeling from your your extensive climb is dissipating.
You see up ahead of you a small village tiny huts scattered around the peak of this mountain
and even in the sky around you floating mountains in and of themselves with waterfalls
cascading off of them and down the mountain peaks around you.
Sorry question these floating mountains miniature mountains giant mountains I'm not sure like
did we reach the peak and then above that there is now just like yeah a whole other
world of mountains.
Yeah look we've gone on a side quest in the other storyline now we need to keep climbing
mountains in this storyline not with anything really interesting just with climbing more
mountains no no they are like mountain peaks so there are more like mountain peaks so on each
peak there are more of these tiny huts and buildings and people's and at the peak of the
one that you are on you see a singular small hut with like a little wisp of what looks like a
smoke from a fire there's a tree the tree with like little birds fluttering around it
that's still a distance away at a plateau down around that is a small makeshift city
and as you continue to climb Glim how are you feeling as you're approaching this
this mecca of Bahamania?
I think Bahamania is probably the right way to describe what Glim is feeling she's like
shaking like okay which is a bit funny because she's met him but this is a different him like
that him got rescued and was like well you met him when he was unconscious too
like you didn't it just was a different kind of vibe than like Bahamet and his prime and we're
like in his place and yeah so heart pounding despite the the healing sunshine just like so
anxious but excited happy excited okay okay it looks like again you're kind of spiraling here
oh thank you for noticing it really I I am I think I'm gonna be okay though maybe I should
just not um what if I just don't take the lead that is a great idea because if anyone
here is gonna totally freak the fuck out it's me yeah it's true you're you may mess
everything up no offense Glim but it would totally be on accident Moot you're like so
calm and like chill and stuff I'll probably swear and offend him like maybe you should
introduce us and like say like what we're here for I mean yeah I I guess I could probably do that
I mean I'm a little nervous but yeah sure yeah well you're just so like chill and succinct
you probably been writing everything down Flamikinskins is just gonna try fuck them it's
gonna be weird no it's gonna happen later it's not like it's like right hey hey hello
like a Gotham I have been talking about it like she's been giving me what yeah oh no she's not
encouraging this but also no offense to Goth you're just probably gonna come off just maybe a
little too doom and gloom and abrasive and like like we we want to like lead up to it not just
I've heard that it's not a bad thing it's actually probably very helpful in so many
situations I mean I'm not the person for this job either I think it's got to be Moot
I'll give it my best shot that's all anybody can hope oh my god stop Flamikinskins doom will
have to be a component yeah no doom and gloom has to play a part obviously because
I mean it's like hey Bahamut what you doing we'll fuck later no so the world's gonna end
real sad we should probably fuck over it wow fuck over it it's like talk it over but like
like fuck it over I don't think that's also what that means either I think you shouldn't talk at all
okay well we'll go for drinks later because like we got some time obviously I mean uh yeah yeah I
mean you said the bugs things those were relevant uh in the situation that we're trying
to avoid uh so we don't have a lot of time but I see like a bar up there like there's
probably some fun being had you look ahead and as you are coming up to the edge of the city
there are people of all types and you're walking through the town and there is a
there is a swinging sign kind of gently swaying in the breeze and it says the most
devout bar and grill just down the street though Sully sees the devout bar and grill
and is like oh I had a question is Amy not a Sully okay uh you said all sorts of people are
these like demigods to be living among the god like what kind of what kind of Athenian
Olympian situation yeah going on yeah this this definitely has a vibe of there are there are
like angels and demigods and like you get a glim probably specifically uh maybe it gets a vibe of
like some of these people probably are dragons in a humanoid form transform I bet it's hard
to get into a bar as a dragon well the size is a problem yeah it's just their insurance it
doesn't cover it you gotta have they get drunk they burn the place down it's a whole
you know how many pints of meat you gotta drink your dragon size is crazy very expensive in this
economy in this economy price of gas to get up this mountain am i right man inflation you know
what I mean but you also get a sense that there are regular old people and by regular
old people I mean like pAlydins and clerics and devout and followers of Bahamut coming to
seek something for themselves you over here conversations of like large battles happening
in Bahamut's name and others of a more monk or cleric types speaking of the peaceful ways
that they are trying to affect the world in Bahamut's name is are any of those battles
like that they're talking about like recognizable as like where we could pinpoint
where we are in time maybe oh like yeah i've heard of the battle of oh shit that was
one week before everything went south right oh chris is paying attention you guys right i know
i'm just wandering through those magical village roll a history and we'll use that to determine
what you over here do i over here are you actively listening no um 21 being honest amy
wants to actively listen sully's not actively listening he's looking around being like what's
this what's this there's powder everywhere save it for our musical episode 21 for sure
you overhear some that place uh battles like even pre cult of dragon like these are battles
of like a talking of historical kind of events big events but then you catch
as you are walking nearest to the most about bar and grill there's a group of
i don't want to say broey but probably broey pAlydins talking about a battle that sounds
uh reminiscent to you and that it was relatively close to the point when portals started to open
up it was a battle that happened in a town called flair heart a town called flair heart at
the base of the spine of the world and there was one of these portals that opened up and
strange creatures started to pour out and there was a large fight against them to drive them back
and thought it was successful and these pAlydins are talking about that and how they they they
put them back where they were and you know ah it was so easy right like we were just we came
in swinging on maces and it was like hey bahamut he's a real cool guy yeah i was like
playing 18 rounds of golf i was just hitting them hitting them right back into that portal
right back in swing best four under par thank you bahamut so aghast with all of the uh social
graces that you would expect um just immediately is like right up on their table like looking
down on them battle of flair heart how long ago
it's the middle time and we're here now and we're gonna talk about how you can join us on
Patreon because we need a couple people who can join us because we want to do great things on
Patreon for you and that includes a live show was that to a tune it was the tune that was in
my head so yes it was to a tune not specifically a pop pop culture tune i'm so rich we're not
desperate let's we're not desperate but but you listener like you specifically yeah you that
we would really like that one right there you with the hair you and the hat uh and the
smile oh you took the bote off so that's it you could be you too it looks good you should put it
back on but you do you yeah that's fair kyle's joining us in the middle of this kristen episode
so we're really confusing everybody that's right why am i here who knows we like to just
throw people in wherever we can get them permanent cast member kyle class it's just here
that's fine surprise surprise it doesn't have to be a reason kyle no no although those aren't
bad candies not great for theater but that's where you mostly get reasons um but i'm going to talk
to kyle right now because he doesn't probably specifically know about the goal we're trying
to reach uh when we reach 100 patrons in our Patreon at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
we're going to throw a live improv show we've done these before okay they are a lot of fun
but when we reach 100 patrons we're going to do that and then try and wrangle several
or as many guests as we can probably a couple of of NPCs gone past so this is where i ask you
kyle do you want to come here for you wow not on the spot at all no pressure no not in the
middle of an interlude with everyone listening wow the only issue with that rus as has been
previously stated in this moment is that i am a permanent cast member that's right not not
considered a guest not considered a guest which i'm obligated to do as a permanent cast member
so yes all right well kyle will be there guaranteed because he's a permanent cast member
not because he's an mpc guest who frequently comes in and out so we're going to have to find
somebody else maybe we can uh give a good old cicero a call and see if dance wants to fly back
in uh well it's that gig economy right now too so it's like maybe he really would like
to come join that's right uh but Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast where we're at 98 patrons
so you can make a huge difference today support us and the show that you are listening to
right now and it's episode gajillion so clearly you enjoy what we're doing
and that would be super awesome and thank you hey this is past future rus future from when
we were first recorded this past from when you're listening to this no present this is
present rus anyways long story short we made 100 patrons between the time we recorded this
and the time that you're listening to this now so a huge thank you to yanuk andreas and co
salesgiver and of course our entire Patreon community who have helped us reach this 100
patron goal thank you all so very much if you've been looking for a time to come join
us on the Patreon community support us as creators and the shows that we create now is
an amazing time because then you're going to get an invite to this uh to this improv live
show and we're going to have such a good time okay and now we'll get back to the episode
thanks everybody have a great have a great week oh oh oh bye let's see you bye
do you speak common oh sorry you're talking to us i thought cool so i forgot that you were
saying to the bros uh oh yeah it was like i thought you were going to everybody else like
how long ago was that that was like 10 10 and a half years ago nope uh uh yeah yeah
what are you talking about bladder flare i was like a couple days ago uh we we just like hop
skipped and jumped up here we're like we're gonna go tell bahamut how great we did in his
name oh so great yeah in the middle of this person talking she grabs one of their beers
and walks away back to the group yeah you're gonna have to no it's it's fine it's fine
we got it we got it bomb that's gonna bless and bestow us upon all the greatness that
he's gonna do glim's like embarrassed these are like the the most recent like
i'm the only bahamut follower that you guys really know very well and i'm so embarrassed that this
is like oh my god do they think they can't they're so embarrassing glim is this like a
they should only be she's overwhelmed with the intensity of uh are we are are we in the bar now
uh so nice sorry about the weather's nice all the time there's a lot of al fresco situation
i'm there yeah i was picturing like a beach bar you know where it's like open and there's the
bar that opens there is the sound of waves you're not sure where they're coming from
but people are are shredding waves somewhere yeah that's it that's what they do on them
yeah yeah and they're also snowboarding yeah sure yeah yeah absolutely it's waterfalls
it's fine yeah there's snowboarding there's water i'm just juxtaposing everything that
we're saying yeah sorry it's hot it's also cold though too it's real cool yeah
um yeah so i was picturing like you know agus storming over to these guys on the patio grabbing
their beer and coming back to the group with with the pint just like the battle of flair heart
three days ago we have less time oh that means we we have and he saw he's counting on his
fingers and he's like four yeah that's not a lot of time no that's that's less i was
hoping we were further back yeah we kind of need to um oh my god you guys we're gonna have to live
through the worst bit again not if we stop it no we won't we'll just we'll just make it happen
no because the worst bit's not gonna happen now well no but what if we're here to stop
and we have to is it all over again what if i lose my other eye what if i'm blind what if
what if it's all right we're not gonna let that happen to you sully
uh uh okay hey sully yeah it's gonna be okay no we're not fucking it doesn't matter don't
worry about it you're not my type i'm worried about it now i just said i just said you're not
my time that does not negate that don't worry about it don't worry about it oh sorry
friends here
okay yeah no you know i'm gonna get it together because it's a mission and you know yeah no we
should probably like make our way to bahamut or see what other kind of sites are around this
town here uh yeah the first one yeah definitely the first one yeah i think the first one if
you want to go see some sites we could pick you up on the way back no i mean we got a
message to deliver i'm nothing if not uh on time with my deliveries if you know what i'm
saying oh god i do not i don't want to you don't want to i think that we were talking about the
sex thing earlier agoth and you deliver it this whole time has flamingo been trying to teach
her innuendo and it's when you've got it's when you got to me and i can't even do the
what are you delivering yeah um you want me to say it out loud
i feel like you've backed yourself into this corner russ what's happening now my vagina is
what i'm delivering huh yeah how can a vagina be late i'm just curious you know what i am
immediately sorry are you are you curious nope silly because i feel like i just feel like
i put my i just put my my my my my i was gonna say nose in other people's businesses and now it
just seems wrong but it's just like you know somebody says someone says something and i
immediately feel like i have to respond it's something that now is part of a very long list
of negative traits i'm finding about myself but it's okay because bahama is gonna fix
everything look sully a vagina is never late it's there when you need it unless it's pregnant
boom and he strides away but like not fast because he's got teeny tiny legs so
oh it's so confusing it is yeah none of this is we made it to bahamut town bahamut
bahamut city so naturally we need yes yes that's it now we need to say vagina the most times we
ever have that's true we've had a lot of dick jokes in the past and i feel like the
vagina has been ignored that's true let's get into it classic am i right it's happening
you're welcome you guys it's been quite the dry spell of like dick jokes and stuff so here
yeah it's been real dark and depressing really yeah it's been hard to make dick jokes in the
darkest time you don't want to be like things don't matter people are dying
a god's buried in a cave exactly yeah i can't do that yeah no sorry everybody this has been
your uh why we haven't done a lot of dick jukes jik jukes interlude
uh-huh all right back to it you uh carry on down the street away from the most devout bar and
grill and you pass by several other uh several other stores and less devout places less devout
places what is the economy like in bahamutopolis yeah i feel like are things just free are they
beyond money uh no no uh no oh no it's harsh right no no you hear from another patio being like
they're they're just not fungible and did you get the bahama tokens dude like i
i had one but it wasn't the funged version i gotta get the non-fungible non-fungible they just can't
be funged all right uh we make jokes about this because we don't know what it is because we don't
understand it's terrifying to me yeah but it could be the way of the future oh god does that
not terrify everybody uh but right now uh uh bahamutopolis uh is uh appears to be driven
by a a gold driven economy uh very much like everything else it appears this uh this city
portion you are in uh appears like any other city aside from all of the majestic statues
of uh various platinum dragons various platinum dragons i mean there's a lot of platinum dragon
but there's various statues of different poses i was gonna say there's is he like like a lot
of like like bro poses yeah there's there's some of those uh there's some where he's very stoic
as you get nearer towards so there's the one where he's dabbing yeah the dabbing one is by
the dance hall yeah the bahama square oh no the yeah deep thinking yeah what is that even called
does that have a name i don't know that yeah i don't know that grow on the chance thinking
no it's the gross boy i have just named it it's when you you know you put your chin
in between like in the crook of your thumb and your pointer finger like you're like doing
like finger guns pew pew and you're like um like no i'm gonna keep doing it it's called
gross boy yeah it's gonna help yeah yeah yeah we're not gonna google that somebody tell us
in the comments uh there's no comments on podcast tell us in the comments no that's not
like comment subscribe the complete opposite of me can you believe it yeah
everybody who's listening you would think that i had planned something more majestic for this
but really what i have written down here is the most about bar and grill which is a lot
of bros we have bahama's home which we've already described but have yet reached uh there's
the there's a museum that you walk up to yeah oh last time we were in a museum didn't go
bahama's museum you haven't been in the museum that was the other crew so there are two separate
museums that we've walked into one had grants is talking to a group of school children right
yep it's imagine how that goes and you walk up to bahama's museum uh there is an attached
gift shop bahama bobblehead puppets you see actually as you pass the gift shop glim what's
your passive perception i'm gonna get passive just because you are in such a place in a confusing
place because of the most of our bar and grill where it's like holy fuck uh but also all of
the majesty around you yeah all the like cool bahamut stuff and then like the other followers
so i'm like i don't know if you guys really get it uh 11 it's my passive person okay not
super great but you a catch out of the corner of your eye like there's in the middle of this
gift shop area there appears to be a like glass case with a very familiar looking
uh piece of paper folded paper illuminated by the by light
uh
i actually thought it was a good uh clarification because i thought you meant illumination like
monk writing you know with the fanciness kind of like uh a pot light above illuminated by a
light i just missed the a conjoiner okay you see it and there's this paper it gives you like
this uh you're not really paying attention to it as you walk by but as soon as you see it there's
like this this moment of recognition and i'm just gonna stop and turn and look at it and as you
turn and look at it you see one of your old pamphlets in this in this glass case in the
middle of this gift shop
uh guys when it what look at it make false sentences that's from glim okay but look and
the light and then it's illuminated and then that's remember i give those out and are you
guys is that a pamphlet oh my god wow i really thought they were all just so long gone i mean
oh yeah didn't because i mean even before things got really bad people like i got us kicked out of
so many quite often arrested yeah oh well you might be kind of a big deal here so i guess he
like i mean of course he knows us i was gonna say i guess he must like know who we are but
of course he does because we're on a mission to save the world and he sent you obviously
bahamut would know about that so but this oh yeah somehow that kind of caught me down a
little bit like took me back to you know like the good old days when we would just
kind of cruise around and make friends and try and like steal off boats and give out pamphlets
and light people on fire for touching our donkey you know just like fun stuff kid stuff
right we've come so far we were so young okay let's go moot i feel like pretty okay
okay i'm not gonna lose it i believe in you glim so i just said we were so young isn't he only like
28 now 10 years in the future for me yeah but it was a hard 10 years yeah yeah you'd have no idea
that we're all in our 20s and be like are you about your 40 year old they're all totally
gray uh yeah we haven't said before but yeah yeah it's been time has not been kind darkest
timeline ages you yeah yeah but mood is totally down with adopting that silver fox mentality
yeah you got it you carry on through the city you see many other things many other very
kitschy things as far as what you uh had hoped for or had thought about when you uh reached
this uh plateau or this plaza this uh state that you could being so close to bahamut in his
home and hometown you walk around there's a a spiral pathway that follows all the way up to
the top of the peak of this mountain and you it seems like you're going on forever as you do it
and you finally after is only a few minutes but seems like an eternity
reach the top of this mountain and it opens into this uh small plateau there is a burning
uh what looks like a a smoldering fire out in the center of this area there are a couple
of benches along the side nobody's seated at them um there's a small modest shack you could
say nothing overstated nothing overdone there's the tree that you saw as you kind of crested
and began to see everything before you flitting about this tree are several canaries flying
around through the air and landing back on it and off and around a corner that wasn't visible
from your position down below are two larger trees and a a hammock strung between them
swaying back and forth in the wind with a a figure lying prone and presumably asleep
as you approach this small home area as we walk up zellie looks to his left and sees
uh take a number ticket dispenser fishing back in five and it's like taking what all right
and he pulls out a number from it and it's number like i don't know four billion one hundred
like it's a it's a ridiculously large number like you need another ticket because the number
continues yeah i'm just continually pulling it is this a joke what is this uh you see out in the
in the sky uh a number illuminated and it says number 75 oh my god
Dumbgeons and Dragons season two episode 126 starring Amy More as sullivan sleight
carla max dead is glim tom layered as moot kristin Flemmons as a goth and Russ More is
your dungeon master editing production and sound design by Russ More this episode featured music
from epidemic sound and Kavin mcleod of incompetech.filmmusic.io sound effects from
epidemic sound boom library and sound ideas a huge thank you to our supporting producers
Gabriel Lynch, Jessica Babyok, Kat Waterflame, Jacob Madden, Christian Brown, Devin Michaels,
Craig Zeiss, Aaron Stevens, Darylith, Lulahan, L.A. Branton, ALex Sarin, Perry Mathy, Nathaniel
Teeter, and Nicholas Cooper. To support Dumbgeons and Dragons and our many other productions and
get access to an exclusive podcast called The Adventures of, bonus episodes, and much more,
please join our Patreon at Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast. You can also follow us at
facebook.com slash dumb dragon podcast and on instagram and twitter at dumb dragon cast.
Thank you for listening. Have a great week. We'll talk again soon.
Moot you get a very you you can feel the anxiety coming off of glim. What do you what
do you do for glim? Uh let me see if I have anything in my spell list that I could just like
help her out with. I don't think so. A lot of it is like mind sliver but like a positive version
of mind sliver. I mean wild magic is edible. I can just chill out a little bit. Uh yeah I know
I don't really have anything even like words that spell wise. That's true. I should have
been a bro. Dumbgeons and Dragons is a dumb dragons production.